An Enabler Asks for Help

Someone I love is buried
beneath fear and paralysis.
She has forgotten how gloriously You made her.
And I seem to have forgotten that Your love for her
far exceeds my limited version.

Forgive me for the many years I’ve rushed in to do Your job. (As if!)
My trust in You has been wavering and impatient.
But how do I watch a train-wreck like this?
How do I resist the crazy urge to stand in front of the train
that threatens the life of my loved one?

Watching her suffer has moved me to act.
But has it moved me to sit and seek Your solution?

Not until now. Finally. The uncertainty scares me, though.
Putting ‘my rescue-plan’ on hold makes me feel uncaring
and negligent. But I am actually trying to practice radical trust
in You. Please help me be strong enough to be with her
without feeling responsible for her life.

This grip is horrible to hold, and so hard to release.

May my faith in You be sufficient
to stop this train, and get these filthy whites clean.

– Erika Harris

Meditating and prayer – Laundry + Prayer: I Don’t See the Difference – Prayables